On New Year’s Eve afternoon, I got a text message from my friend Jenna that I haven’t yet answered:
I didn’t reply, because my answer is… I don’t know.
As anyone who has followed this blog for any length of time — which at this point I know is pretty much down to my mom, sister, cousins, and maybe a few friends — has undoubtedly noticed, I haven’t exactly been the most prolific writer in the past couple of years. I’ve been so bad, in fact, that I’ve been teetering on the edge of pulling the plug altogether for quite some time now. Every time a bill comes in for my domain registration or WordPress upgrades, I ask myself, “Why am I still paying money for this little piece of internet I’m not even using?”
The answer is twofold: it doesn’t cost very much, and there’s at least some part of me that doesn’t really want to be done with blogging.
I do, however, want to be done with this version of the blog. I got tired long ago (clearly) with the here’s-what-I’m-up-to-today posts. I want it to be… more. More focused. More useful. More interesting.
But I don’t know yet what that means. Does more focused mean diving deeply into a single topic? Or a limited slate of topics? (And what level of “expertise” does this require?) Does more useful mean writing more about my work? (I do a lot of thinking and talking about the digital/social world, but not much of it is written down.) Or does it mean telling more stories about capital-L-Life*? (I suppose I’m old enough now to have a few Deep Thoughts to share, right?)
And what, pray tell, does “more interesting” mean? More interesting to me, obviously, so I’ll actually show up here — or somewhere — and do the work. But if it’s interesting only to me then, well, putting it out there publicly is beyond useless.
At this stage of the game, I know only what the blogging plan isn’t: little daily vignettes about me. If it goes in a more work-y direction, it may end up moving over to the new version of smheffern.com I’ve been playing around with building. Heck, it may anyway, because I’m using SquareSpace, which is prettier than WordPress — though I don’t know how easy it is to move eight years of posts over. (Though I am fairly sure I wouldn’t want to move them all anyway.)
Once I get it at least somewhat figured out, I’ll be back with something… new posts, or at least a farewell.
In the meantime, Happy New Year!
* One thing I’ve been thinking about on the “life” front is some version of a life list (a/k/a bucket list, though I dislike that term) that goes both backward and forward. I’ve never made a “must do” list for my life, but I know I’ve already gone places and done things that would be on it if it existed. It would be fun to revisit those experiences while also building out a list for the future.