I have put off writing all day, hoping that I’d perk up and have something chipper to say. Alas, I don’t. Its been a tough week.
I have two friends who are living some of the most difficult moments I think a parent can endure. Given how much their experiences have affected me, I can barely imagine how they have survived this week or will get through the weeks to come.
One has a profoundly disabled child who went from the ER to the ICU on Sunday night with sepsis, pneumonia, and possible heart complications. Miraculously, she has stabilized enough to transfer from the Medical University of South Carolina Children’s Hospital (where they were on vacation) to Texas Children’s Hospital by air ambulance tonight. They still have a long way to go but she is fighting hard.
The other was pregnant with a baby boy diagnosed several weeks ago as having downs syndrome and a heart condition. She lost him this past week, at 33 and 1/2 weeks. His memorial service was this afternoon and it was heart breaking. I don’t think I have ever seen such a tiny coffin.
At the same time, I am so grateful that they had the service. I think so many times in these circumstances family and friends don’t know what to do or what to say, and often don’t treat the loss as a death in the traditional sense. I’m so grateful that my friend was so brave to help all of us understand her families loss and her pain. In so doing, she has also helped us to hold her up and be better friends.
Such a flood of emotions this week. From worrying all night Sunday that sweet Caroline would die before the sun came up, to mourning the loss of a baby boy I had yet to meet, but who was already so loved and so anticipated by so many.
So I sign off tonight grateful beyond measure for sweet baby James, his life and his health (and mine and Chris’s too). I love him so much. Being his Mama is the best thing in the world.